Time Out

Now then now then boys and girls!!!

I suppose the upshot of all this is that it shows we are all different and all react to things in different ways. Thanks everyone for contributing to the comments as it made for lively debate if nothing else. Let me see if I can open another can of worms with this post he he (just joking) I will still endeavour to tell it as it is and as it happens without adding or, for that matter, removing any of the juicy bits.

As I started work a few days ago I headed towards Paddington via Warrington Crescent and the pub on the roundabout was packed with Celtic fans who’d been to Wembley for the Spurs game. I picked up a full complement of five and from the accents I guessed they were Glaswegians. No sooner had they settled in for the ride to another pub in Kilburn than the banter started. I don’t know if they were talking to me but they asked me all the questions I get asked every night without waiting for an answer as if mocking me. “How long are you on till?” “Have you been busy?” “have you had anyone famous in here?” Then they started talking amongst themselves for a few minutes before turning their attention back to me. “Fuck me mate, is the meter OK?” “Are you gonna pay half the fare?” Then on a more serious note one of them asked me about the different tariff rates and why we were on rate 2. I gathered he may well be a cabbie in Scotland and had a genuine interest so I tried my best to explain it. He then stated that one of his pet hates was when passengers got out of his cab, shut the door and banged on the roof a few times, something that happens to everyone from time to time. In spite of all the quibbling, whether serious or in jest, we arrived at The Black Lion on Kilburn High Road and they paid me the fare with a £2 tip and the last one out closed the door and banged the roof of the cab twice to which they all burst into fits of laughter. Bring back the Home Internationals I say!!!

I’ve only got three more shifts before I go off to Ipswich on Friday night for Jane’s daughters’ wedding. I have to go out tomorrow and buy myself a suit for the occasion, something I haven’t done for ages. I’m normally a trousers and shirt guy but a suit is required for this one and in any case it will also serve as a funeral suit should anyone I know snuff it anytime soon including me!!

Only a short post today but rest assured there’ll be more on the way so check back soon.

Take care out there.

L.C.

No Need For Foul Language

Hi folks

It’s posting time again.

My body clock has gone haywire and I’m up when I should be asleep. This plays havoc with home life because now I’m getting up as it’s time for work. Food has to be made (or ordered and delivered) and mouths fed before I can do that so I find I manage to finally get out by 8 to 8.30pm which then finds me struggling to find jobs that are already sitting at the restaurants and bars that I should have been dropping them at a few hours earlier. I have to head straight for the nearest rank to get “off the mark” and hope my experience will get me that next job.

A few weeks ago I could do no wrong. There was so much happening around town such as Wimbledon, concerts in Hyde Park and Wembley Stadium that the work was in plentiful supply. Since the schools broke up for the summer the work has taken a nose dive and we’re all out here looking for the same non-existent jobs.

The Sloane Avenue Boogie ain’t even working as it’s supposed to but somehow, by hook or by crook, I’m managing to survive. (I got slagged off by my mates for calling it that, does anyone else think it’s cringeworthy??)

The cab has been behaving itself (as it should at 8 months old) and I haven’t been back to the garage since the 10K service three months ago. Since I’ve been paying the weekly rent through the bank there’s been no need to go there. I did have a couple of halogen headlights blow but I’m now a dab hand at changing them. The lights on this cab don’t have that awkward clip that has to be fiddled with instead they have a plastic screw on cap which makes the job a hundred times easier. But I am now only 3k away from the next service so I suppose I will have to go there in the next six weeks or so.

I was reading other blogs recently and clicked on Chris’s to see if he’d posted anything new. I seem to remember him saying that he was going to do loads of posts about his new Mercedes Taxi but it seems to have petered out. Well he’s still out and about and chucking the Merc through those six foot sixes like there’s no tomorrow. The only problem he’s had with the cab, even after taking it back to KPM a few times is with the electric doors. They’re forever sticking or just refusing to open at all causing him to have to jump out and open them manually. Oh and remember what I said last post about GBX? Well he got a job down to Hastings the other night. Nuff said!!

I did manage to snag a job down to Epsom the other night but in the main it’s all bread and butter work of the £10 to £20 variety. I have also got used to hitting the “accept” button on the radio and after 7 weeks of not doing even enough to cover the rent I actually got paid £34 yesterday so things must be looking up even if it doesn’t feel like it sometimes.

So, one story to tell. It’s a story about how something can blow up out of nothing.
I’d just dropped off at Euston Station and took a peek down the rank to see how many cabs were there. There was none so I drove down the ramp and put on. 30 seconds later a woman walked down the stairs and got in. She asked for Clapham Junction and also said she’d need a cash point. Off we went. As I turned into Great Portland Street I pulled up at the Lloyds Bank. She was listening to her iPod and hadn’t realised I’d stopped for her to get money so I turned the light on and she looked up and removed her headphones.

Her: What’s the matter?
Me: There’s a cash point for you to get the money from.
Her: (Tutting) For fuck sake (Why did she have to say that?)
Me: What d’you mean for fuck sake, what’s wrong with you?
Her: Why are you chucking me out to get money here when I could get it in Clapham? (How was that “chucking her out”?)
Me: (completely over the top response) I’m not fucking chucking you out I just thought it would be better for you to get the money at the first available ATM in case the one in Clapham don’t work.
Her: Excuse me? (acting all shocked that I’d dared to swear at her even though she swore first.)
Me: (Losing it completely as I do from time to time) I tell you what love, get your bags and get another fucking cab.

She tried to start an argument but my hackles had already risen and I was having none of it so I insisted she took another cab. She grabbed her stuff and slammed my door shut and called me a few names. I drove away thinking that my reaction had been a bit over the top but she needn’t have reacted like she did and it just goes to show how someone can ruin a perfectly peaceful evening because they had obviously had a bad day. I drove down the remainder of Great Portland Street and turned to enter Oxford Circus when a guy hailed me and asked if I could run him out to Hainault, a £50 job, which kept me busy and gave me no time to dwell on what had just happened.

I have to try and keep busy this week as I am having next weekend off to attend Jane’s daughter’s wedding in Ipswich. My annual trip to Spain is also coming up at the end of September and Jane will also be coming with me and my mum for the week so let’s hope the work picks up a bit so that I won’t be skint.

Take care out there.

L.C.

Already so soon??

Hi folks

following on from yesterday.....

With a full belly and a sense of optimism rarely seen as I'm generally a total pessimist I got out to work after my Chinese meal and started the arduous task of trawling the streets for work.

My first stop was the rank at Paddington Station where after a suprisingly short wait I took a French businessman down to Old Brompton Road. I then made my way to South Kensington but was unable to get onto the already overpopulated rank. A few nights previously I'd had a bit of luck doing the "Sloane Avenue Boogie" which means circling up and down Sloane Avenue until hailed. There's always plenty of work coming out from Chelsea Cloisters and Nell Gwynne House but there's also loads of cabs doing the same thing so by doing "The Boogie" you stand a better chance of being first to the job. So as it turned out I boogied half a dozen times and got nothing. Next port of call would have to be Victoria Station. En route I was hailed in Eaton Gate by a nice couple needing to go to Ennismore Gardens. The next fare took me out to Chiswick and I thought I recognized the guy from the TV or somewhere but couldn't quite place him but he did give me a nice fiver tip on top of the £17 fare. I was already doing much better than the previous night and my spirits and love for the job rose considerably.

Back on the South Kensington rank and I'm the second cab. A lady approaches the front cab and he shakes his head. "Aye aye" thinks me, "what's going on here then?". "Do you take credit cards?" she asks after arriving at my open window. "I certainly do" says I, getting all excited at the prospect of one of those elusive roaders I mentioned in yesterdays blog.
"Loveley" says she, "then can we go to Gilston Road please?". My face must have visibly dropped because she said "is that alright?" I told her that the company would charge her an extra £2, hoping it would put her off as it does to a lot of people, but she was fine with that and off we went to Gilston Road, about five minutes up the road, for the princely sum of £6.60. I must add at this point that I do enjoy doing credit card jobs and having the facility has actually got me my money when passengers have had trouble getting money from ATM's. So even though the monthly fees to Radio Taxis (£160) are quite excessive I'd rather have the facility than not. I've also been short on the radio work in recent weeks but that's just me being too choosy rather than the lack of work and I've made an effort in this last week to do whatever comes my way regardless of the destination.

The rest of the shift was pretty much the same with jobs averaging about six or seven pounds. I was passing by the Hilton Hotel on Park Lane and saw only a few cabs there so decided to put on. 2 minutes later I was on my way to Crouch End for the best job of the night at £34.

Chris was out and about as well and was earning pretty much the same sort of money but my nickname for him is Golden Bollocks because he always manages to do better than me by the end of the shift. He might come out a few hours after me but by the end of the night he'll be on more money. The nickname comes from the last three letters of his previous taxi, GBX, Golden Bollocks Extraordinaire. He'll argue that it should apply to me but he takes some beating.

My last job of the night was from the South Ken area. This guy had been to Royal Ascot and was wearing a top hat and tails. He was as drunk as a skunk and in a chatty mood and also name-dropping like it was going out of fashion. According to him he knew everyone who was anyone and had been in the Royal section at the racecourse mingling with the Queen and all her minions. I took it all with a pinch of salt as you must doing this job and he was at his destination within 10 minutes.

So all in all a better night but still not as much as I'd like and remember that tonight is Wednesday and potentially the worst day of the week.

God help us!!

Take Care.

L.C.

I just read my emails and this one caught my eye and as I feel strongly about what our boys in the military are doing then I thought I'd share it with you.

Recently, British Royal Marines in Iraq wrote to Starbucks because they
wanted to let them know how much they liked their coffees, and to
request that they send some of it to the troops there.

Starbucks replied, telling the Royal Marines thank you for their
support of their business, but that Starbucks does not support the war,
nor anyone in it, and that they would not send the troops their brand
of coffee.

So as not to offend Starbucks, maybe we should support them by NOT
buying any of their products!

I feel we should get this out in the open. I know this war might not be
very popular with some folks, but that doesn't mean we don't support
the boys on the ground, fighting street-to-street and, house-to-house.

If you feel the same as I do then pass this along.
Thanks very much for your support. I know you'll all be there again
when I deploy once more.

Sgt. Howard Wright.
1 Platoon, Recon Company, Royal Marines

PLEASE DON'T DELETE THIS... PLEASE PASS TO EVERYONE ON YOUR E- MAIL
LIST, IN MEMORY OF ALL THE TROOPS WHO HAVE BEEN WOUNDED, LOST LIMBS AND
EVEN DIED, SO THAT WE MAY HAVE THE RIGHT TO CHOOSE !

Also, don't forget that when the Twin Trade Towers were hit, the fire
fighters and rescue workers went to Starbucks because it was close by
for water for the survivors and workers, and Starbucks CHARGED THEM!!!
AN ADDED NOTE TO THIS: STARBUCKS HAD STORES ON SEVERAL MILITARY BASES
IN THE UNITED STATES. THEY ARE NOW BEING REMOVED BECAUSE OF THIS.

There are 227 Starbucks stores across the UK, and there's no doubt that
our soldiers would get the same response from this company, so let us
do our bit and boycott Starbucks to show them how despicable theiractions are.

Waterloo Bridge

Hi folks

A bit of news on the home front for friends and relatives.
My dad’s kidneys finally gave up the fight and he’s now on dialysis. He started off at the Hammersmith Hospital but has now secured a spot at his local hospital in Harrow and has to attend 3 times a week for four hours a time. He’s also being treated for angina and has a couple of narrowed arteries which need attention. In spite of all that he’s still quite upbeat about life and continues to work from home as a translator and lovingly tend to his tomato plants in the greenhouse.

My own diabetes sometimes gets the better of me and on a recent visit to the doctor I was to be given a new treatment which involved injecting myself (not insulin) but I managed to get her to hold off for the next three months as I promised to start excercising and eating better. I joined a gym nearby and after two sessions the gym closed for refurb for a month (just as I was getting in to it!!) and now I try and do power walking and other stuff until it re-opens. I still struggle with the food side of it and as I write this I’m waiting to take delivery of a Chinese meal I ordered for the boys and me.

Since my last post I think the work has picked up a notch. It got really desperate at one point and the standard joke amongst me and my mates is “I’ll meet you at Waterloo Bridge” where we would then contemplate launching ourselves off into an after-life less complicated. But thankfully “almost” normal business has been resumed and such drastic measures have been placed on the back-burner for the moment. I still think the quality of the work has diminished and those long runs out into the sticks are virtually non-existent. Well, at least I’m not getting them anymore, what about some of you other cabbies, are you getting the roaders?

There’s been a lot written recently about reclaiming the work we’ve lost over the years. Work from venues such as the nightclubs in and around the West End where minicabs (the enemy) now rank up (illegally) outside waiting to rip-off the revellers who want to get home to the suburbs. Now, lines of London taxis can be seen outside these same clubs and bars and the passengers will end up paying a sensible price via the metered fare and are realising just how badly they’ve been ripped off over the last few years.

I continue to ply my trade in the South Kensington area as well as Victoria. The average job from South Ken is about a fiver but the waiting time isn’t too bad. Later in the evening the nightclub nearby (Boujis) provides a steady stream of work and the jobs may (or may not) get a little more lucrative, such as Richmond, Twickenham and other nice destinations.

As far as stories go I can’t recall anything particularly meaty to recount. I did pick up a druggie in Earls Court Road one night and drove her to Beaumont Crescent in West Kensington. She had about £2 on her and went off to get the rest from her boyfriend who wasn’t to keen to part with any money so he stormed off leaving her to try something else. After the meter hit a tenner I cut my losses and pulled off. I was having such a good night I never batted an eye lid but I recalled 19 years ago when I was a fresh faced butter boy and four kids did a runner into the Chippenham Estate and I went home to sulk.

(Gone for Dinner)

That was nice. Sweet and sour chicken and special fried rice.
Now it’s time for work and I hope it’s better than last night.

Take Care.

L.C.

Back Again

Hi folks.
Just getting ready to watch the Ricky Hatton – Manny Pacquiao fight so thought I’d rattle a blog off seeing as it’s been almost a month again.

My football team – Leeds United – have made the play-offs again and play Millwall next Saturday live on Sky Sports. I’ll be in Ipswich with Jane for the first game but she’s assured me that I’ll be allowed to watch it without being disturbed. How nice.

The 18th of April was my son Michael’s 21st Birthday and 22 of us converged on the Dragon King in Park Royal to celebrate it. A good time was had by all.

I was just reading my notes and have seen that I’ve been working non-stop for the last few weeks and I feel really worn out and run down.

The cab recently reached the 10,000-mile mark, which meant it was due its first service. I drove it up to my garage and left it with them while I popped round to see my mum & dad. I’d only just arrived and was tucking into some of my mum’s fine spaghetti Bolognese when, after only 30 minutes, the garage rang me on my mobile and said that the cab was ready for collection. I shouldn’t really give a shit because it’s not my cab but if something hasn’t been checked properly because they want to service it themselves instead of paying a service agent to do the work (which in my opinion is done better) then I should feel bothered. The last thing anyone needs is their cab breaking down in some God-forsaken wilderness at 3 in the morning, as can sometimes happen, because corners have been cut to save a few shillings. I’ll say no more until something happens then we’ll see what’s what!!

So, as I said I’ve been working constantly for the past few weeks. Some days have been desperate and others have been fantastic. The first three days of the week are generally the worst and test ones patience to the limit. Ranking is the only way to earn any money and as everyone else has the same idea it can be quite a job getting on my regular stands. I like to use South Kensington the most but as you turn from Glendower Place into Harrington Road you are often met with the sight of at least three, sometimes four, taxis fouling the rank. This often causes problems for buses coming up behind but stubborn cabbies refuse to budge until the line has moved up. When this happens I drive on by and try Victoria. Now that I am on Radio Taxis I can also book into the radio rank there and receive account jobs. In the last few weeks I have been assigned three or four quality jobs ending up at over thirty-five pounds each and with the added bonus of the “Going Home” facility the jobs have taken me in the right direction home.

A few nights ago I was sat on the South Kensington rank when the radio threw me a London Underground job to Ockenden in Essex. The pickups were Sth Ken, Victoria, Westminster, Temple, Monument, Whitechapel and West Ham dropping off at Roneo Corner, Hornchurch, Upminster and Ockenden. Meter fare was £122 but we get 75% of that totalling £95 so not a bad ride at all.

Food plays an important part in my nights work and I’m always on the lookout for a new place to eat. Recently, in the space of a week I tried three places. The first one was a kebab place on Rosebery Ave. After paying a fiver for the pleasure of having my mouth burnt off with the chilli sauce I threw it out the window. There was another one round the corner in Farringdon road and their chicken donner went the same way. A Chinese buffet place on Thurloe Street South Kensington was the next one to get the old heave ho, totally disgusting. Chris and me did stumble across a good’un in Strutton Ground, Victoria where you can fill a box with as much as you can for a fiver and sit in your cab enjoying it, we’ll definitely be back to that one.

How many of you have had disagreements with other motorists, said your piece and then gone on your way? The other night a guy driving a Mercedes U turned in Kensington Road almost slamming into the side of me. Startled, I mouthed a few obscenities at him and went on my merry way. He had other ideas. He came up behind me flashing his lights, honking his horn and gesticulating for me to pull over and sort it out. I was at traffic lights and jumped out to have a go. After a few more obscenities passed between us he told me to pull up round the corner and we’d have it out. Fired up as I was I fully intended to oblige but as I turned from Kensington Road into Palace Gate there were a couple of people looking for a cab so I pulled over. The Mercedes driver, thinking I was pulling over to deal with him, was out of his car in a flash and then seeing that I had only stopped to pick up a fare proceeded to follow me hurling abuse of a very intimate nature. Totally uncalled for and not a very nice thing to endure when you have a fare and can’t jump out and thump him one but hey ho, it’s all part and parcel of every day life as a London cabbie.

I got a call from Chris’s wife the other night informing me that Chris had left his moneybag containing his Blackberry phone on the backseat of my cab. Chris and me had just stopped for a coffee at the Starbucks in Piccadilly and then went about our business. Unbeknown to me Chris had left the moneybag on the back seat, something he also did sometime last year. This time there was a happy ending, as his moneybag was being kept warm by the enormous arse of my female passenger. I asked her to check if it was there and after shifting her weight to one side she was able to retrieve the poor leather pouch with its contents intact. I had picked her up straight after the coffee so I had to deliver her to Waterloo Station before I could reunite Chris with it. He eventually met me at Waterloo and we had a laugh and a joke about it. The last time it happened it cost him about £150.

Todays shift (Saturday night) was a very profitable one. I started by ferrying my daughter to her friend’s house in Tottenham. Before we got there she wanted some new headphones for her iPod so we tried Curry’s in Staples Corner and Brent Cross Shopping Centre but they were both closed.
I made it all the way in to Regents Park before I trapped my first job, a two-hander to Great Portland Street. That was followed by a Marylebone High Street to Hanley Road in Hornsey and then on the way back in an American guy waiting at the Nags Head, Holloway all the way in to the Metropole Hotel. The next four jobs were stressful because of the West End traffic. Brompton Road to Soho, Soho to Royal National Hotel, Russell Square. As they got out five Spaniards wanted to go back into the fray and I took the opportunity to talk the lingo with them. I dropped them at Leicester Square and immediately picked up five guys going to a Club in the Southwark Street Arches. The work was relentless and no sooner had I crossed Southwark Bridge when a hand went up asking to be taken to the Marylebone area. A few more jobs in quick succession saw me deposit an £11 fare at Waterloo where I thought I’d rank up and get a breather. “We’d like to go to Twickenham” says a female voice through my open window after only a few seconds. That alone was a fifty quid ride and left me sixty pence short of my target for the night. So, I drove slowly along the western end of Kensington High Street where, I kid you not, a sexy young lady in pyjamas and slippers was waving me down. She asked to go to Royal Crescent in Holland Park and from what I could gather from her telephone call the guy waiting in his bed for her was in for a real treat. That was enough excitement for me for one night and now as I finish this text I’ll be off downstairs to watch the fight.

STOP PRESS......... I think Ricky better look for another career. Round 2 knock out, tut tut!!

Take care.

L.C.

Stop press........

Chris is now posting again about his experiences with his new cab.
Go to his site from here

Burst Rads And New Cabs

So, leading on from the burst radiator, I went to my garage the following Monday and I was presented with two options. To take the spare cab and either go to work or sit round my dads house until I got a call, or to take the cab to the service agents myself…..in Luton. The guy at my garage said he’d rung ahead and that they’d see me straight away so I wouldn’t be waiting long so I thought a nice drive up there would be ok. I topped up the radiator and took some spare water and set off up the M1. I was there in no time and handed the keys over and took a seat in the waiting room. That was 11am. At 12.30 I thought that the cab would probably be almost ready so asked the lady behind the counter if she knew how much longer it would be. She said they hadn’t even made a start on it and that she had said to my guy that they wouldn’t be able to look at it until after lunch….at 2 o’clock!!!! Thoroughly flabbergasted, I decided to go for a spot of lunch and set off to find a suitable establishment. There was a café nearby and I ordered a Spaghetti Bolognese and a cup of tea. The food was disgusting, the cutlery had the previous diners leftovers stuck to it and there were a couple of chavvy girls in there with unruly kids that were adding to my slowly rising anger. I paid up and went for a long walk and arrived back at the garage at 4pm to find that they were still a good 30 minutes away from completing the job. Still, I always say, “you live and learn” and in future I’ll be taking the spare cab and letting the garage staff bring my cab to these places. What gets me is that they have a service agent close by but there’s obviously issues there which stop them using it. Anyhoo, the cab is now ok and hopefully I won’t have anymore radiator problems although, if some of the comments on the last post are anything to go by I’ll still be needing a few more rads yet.

A couple of days later Chris and me were eating down at the Royal Oak when we were approached by a lady who was recruiting cabbies to star in a commercial for Heinz Ketchup. She said we’d get paid a grand each if chosen for a day and a half of filming. We both signed up but only I got a call-back a few days later to go to a casting studio in the West End. I had to sit round a table with four other cabbies and we each had to tell a story whilst drinking tea and pouring ketchup (from an empty bottle) on an imaginary meal. This was all watched and filmed by representatives from Heinz and at the end of it we were told to wait for a telephone call if we’d been selected. I’m still waiting so I think it’s safe to say I didn’t get the part.

Whilst sitting on the taxi rank outside the Cumberland Hotel recently a car pulled up along side me and asked me to lead him to Holborn Viaduct and he would follow me and pay me when we arrive. I have done this type of job in the past but once or twice, whilst nearing the destination, the following car has mysteriously disappeared leaving me out of pocket so unless there is someone who can ride with me while the car follows I don’t do this type of job anymore and refusal often pisses the driver off which in this case resulted in me being called a few choice names.

That same day I was flagged by a young guy who was, by requesting to be taken to Soho, looking to get laid. I told him he could get laid in any part of town by simply going to a phone box and taking one of the many cards providing all sorts of personal services. We were at Marylebone Station and I stopped at the first phone box I came across. He got out and returned with a few cards and settled for one with a picture of a very buxom blonde. I called the number and was informed of the starting price (£40) and the address, which was just off Baker Street. Not having done this sort of thing before, the young man looked scared out of his wits, so I rang the doorbell for him and ushered him up the stairs to be met by the Madam. I assured him it would be fine and left him in her hands and wished him luck.

Sunday the 22nd of March was the day reality show and Big Brother contestant 27 year old Jade Goody died after a short battle with cervical cancer. Although I wasn’t a fan it was a terrible thing to happen to someone so young and with everything to live for and my condolences go out to all her family, friends and fans.

I got a call from my son asking how to get to Hammersmith as his normal route was blocked by road closures. I was out and about myself that morning after waking early so directed him around the closures. I then picked up a fare in Kings Road and started heading towards Paddington. Forgetting that my son had already told me of the closures I opted to get to Paddington via the west cross route and the Westway. Big mistake. The Paddington slip road was closed so all the traffic was now forced over the Marylebone flyover and was backed up as far as the closed slip road. This is when she piped up. I was called a "con man", a "joke", I was told I’m “not on” and that she wasn’t paying for “this”, and all in all she wasn’t a very happy camper. On top of all that she was about to miss her train. She was trapped on the down slope approaching the flyover with no way of getting off. But she did. She paid me the meter and got out and started stomping off down the slope of the Westway until she was able to step over a small separator and flag another cab in Harrow Road while I just sat in the traffic and looked on. She probably bent his ear about me and what a crap cabbie I am. I love this job.

The hot news this week is that Chris has got himself a brand new cab. He traded in his five year old TXII and collected his brand new Mercedes Vito Taxi from KPM’s on Tuesday. He had a few things to do straight after collecting it and then drove round to my house to show me it. Obviously, as a brand new cab, it looked really nice inside and out but we sat there picking faults with it that would eventually wind us up during the course of our shift. Things we thought would prove a problem were that the taxi has to be in “park” to open the doors. Another major concern is that there are no openable windows just the side ones that open outwards a few inches. Most people like a blast of fresh air every now and then but now have to rely on the AC to do that. If anyone feels sick, like the guy in my last post, then you’re in trouble as there may be no time to prevent it from going all over the inside by the time you have to pull up, put it in park and then open the doors electrically which takes a bit longer than a normal door. In order for the taxi to pass the turning circle test the vehicle is fitted with rear wheel steering. Chris demonstrated this to me in my street and then drove off to work. About five minutes later he rang to say that one of the rear wheels hadn’t returned to its normal position and that he was weaving all over the road causing other motorists to honk the horn at him. Not bad going for a cab only a few hours old. I drove over to where he was and sat with him whilst the mechanic came out to him. He brought with him a car battery and connected it to the motor on the faulty wheel. This pulled the wheel straight and Chris was able to continue his shift with the rear wheel steering disabled until he could get it checked out properly. He has now had this done and is slowly but surely getting the hang of the cab. His only concern now is taking a left turn through the six foot six on Albert Bridge without scraping the much wider cab on the posts. As far as I know he hasn’t done it yet but tonight could be the night. Watch this space.

Chris's new cab in front of mine.

Take care.

L.C.

Eventful

Hi folks
Well I just decided a few minutes ago that I would do another post and thought it best, at 4.30am, to go downstairs and fix myself something to eat first. Being part of a household that could do with collectively shedding a few pounds, I purposely don’t keep large amounts of food in the house. So it came as no surprise to me just now as I opened the fridge that there was sweet FA with which to prepare myself anything resembling a late night snack. So here I sit with two clementines inside me and an orangey smelling keyboard about to begin this post.

Just a quick reply to the commenter on the previous post, APW. You love it 38.

I have to start with a comment to the cabbie that has just been found guilty of drugging and sexually assaulting women in his cab. “Thanks mate, you’ve just systematically ruined our reputation or at the least put lots of doubts in the minds of women who will now think twice about taking a licensed cab home.” When I first heard about this last year I was convinced it was someone who had the use of a licensed taxi but was not actually one of us. How could he be? We’re a respected bunch of guys, everyone trusts us don’t they? I suppose it could be said that there’s a bad apple in every barrel but it’s still hard to believe all the same and I hope women take it for what I’m sure it is and that is the actions of a sick individual who has now been caught and will spend a long time in prison.
Bob Oddy from the Licensed Taxi Drivers Association insisted black cabs were safe, despite Worboys' conviction.
"This man has really let the side down. It won't happen again and you can be confident the next taxi you stop will get you to your destination safely," he said.

And now to work matters. I’ve had quite an eventful time since last post.

One day last week I picked a guy up in the West End and he asked for East Finchley, a nice job by any standards. Within 5 minutes we were traversing Russell Square when he asks me to pull over quick, as he wants to be sick. I always admire guys who do this and always live in hope that women will do the same but they never do. Any way he opened the door and puked in the triangle that was his arm, the door and the step. Some of it splashed on the step but I knew I could hose that straight off. Onwards we went and two minutes later he lowered the window and put most of his upper half out to continue puking. Fine thought I, he’s still being considerate as it’s probably all going straight onto the road. I stop in traffic and people at bus stops and passers by look over at the cab disgusted by what they see. He does this three or four more times and I wonder what the hell he’s been eating and drinking to have so much stuff to bring up. Eventually we arrive at his destination and he hands me £30 for the £26 fare and waits for the change. Now that I have the interior light on I have a better idea of what has happened and I see vomit all over the back window, inside and outside the door and assume it’s probably all down the outside of the cab as well. I decide to keep the change. He stands there looking stupid and I ask him what he’s waiting for. He wants his change. I ask him to return my cab to the state it was in before he got in and he’ll get his change. He tells me to keep the £4 and walks off. I’m now left with a heavily soiled taxi albeit mostly on the outside. I end up driving a few miles home and at 12.30 in the morning start to wash my cab with extra soap suds to get through all the crap that the driving had dried on. It’s a messy business when someone gets sick and even after it has happened to me so many times I never do what I say I will the next time it happens. I managed to get it smelling clean and looking serviceable again and went back to work and took another £60.

A few nights ago I was pulling in to drop a couple off at the Oxford Tube stop in Grosvenor Gardens when out of nowhere a wino staggered into my path. Had I been a second earlier I’d have run him clean over but as it was he bounced off the side of the cab, to the shock and horror of my two passengers, and landed on his arse. His wino pals, who were sitting on a nearby step and witnessed it all, jeered him. He then got up and started making a beeline for me, no doubt to have a go at me for almost killing him. My two passengers by this time had passed the money through the payment slot and had got out. The wino would never have been reasoned with so as he arrived at the cab shouting “oi you” I drove off, thankful that the traffic lights were on green.

As predicted by some cabbie commenters, the radio work has been pretty thin on the ground recently. I met a pal of mine recently who I’d been on the Knowledge with and he’s been on Radio taxis for years and he commented on how bad it was. I’m now reduced to taking credit card fares to earn enough to pay the weekly subs. I hadn’t done a credit card for a few weeks and one passenger wanted me to add a tip to the total but I couldn’t remember the procedure for editing the fare so I lost out to the tune of £5. I also have a sign in the window which asks passengers who want to use their cards to give me sufficient warning as they have to be swiped and processed at the head office. This sign is being completely overlooked and the other night I was presented with a card for payment by a nice French lady at the Sofitel St James’s. On swiping it I found I was in a radio dead-spot and couldn’t complete the transaction as my terminal couldn’t send the details to Control. I asked her to pay cash. She was three pounds short but rather than hang about and lose a fare that was waiting I let her off the three pounds. All in all I sometimes wonder if it’s all worth it.

My shift tonight started really well but ended prematurely. Being a Saturday night the demand for cabs was pretty good and I had a busy cab for the whole time I was out.
I stopped for a coffee and a Cornish Pasty (only a medium sized one!!) at Marylebone Station with Chris, our first coffee break since before he went to Thailand. We only got the stuff and returned to our cabs then talked while we queued up on the rank so as not to waste valuable earning time and he got a job to Wimpole Street whilst I got a better job to Chelsea. After a few more jobs I noticed there wasn't much heat coming from the heater so I checked the heat switch and it was right up on hot. The temperature gauge was right up to overheating level so I quickly pulled over before the engine blew up and checked the water tank. It was empty so I had an Evian bottle full of tap water, which I poured in. It wasn't quite enough but just enough to lower the temperature so I drove to the Texaco in Edgware Road and filled it right up. I moved the cab to a brighter and drier part of the garage and had a look underneath and could see water leaking from somewhere. Great!! That's all I needed. I got my little torch out and found that the radiator had sprung a leak. Not from a hose but from one of the metal elements, part of the radiator itself. Great thought I again, this just gets better and better. Nothing for it but to call it a night head to Tesco's to get some..........chocolate cheesecake for Katie and me. I drove home and sat with Katie, munching the cheesecake and felt a whole lot better. What I plan to do tomorrow is to go to work with loads of bottles of water and just work away, topping up when necessary and hopefully it will hold out until Monday when I'll be able to go to the garage where they'll probably give me a spare cab while they sort it out, hopefully on the same day. So luckily I'd earned most of my money and probably really should have carried on for a bit longer but I didn't fancy getting a long job somewhere only to find my one bottle of Evian wasn't enough to keep the temperature gauge down. I must join the AA because I may need them one night instead of waiting for the Mickey Mouse mechanics that most garages use to save money.

That’s all for now folks. Check back soon.

Take Care.

L.C.

Kippersnatch

What's happened?
Where are you?
Have you died?
All questions being asked of me on a regular basis. I'm still around just not feeling bloggy lately. Things are still happening to me whilst at work and are being lovingly chronicled for future postings. May as well get one in here and now.

Before I begin might I just make a comment on the new U2 album, No Line On The Horizon, which was released here this week. After playing it to death on my PC and in the cab via my iPod I have to say it's another gem of an album by Bono and the lads. There are potentially three or four classic tracks on there. Tracks to watch out for: Magnificent and Moment of Surrender. Superb.

Work, work and more work. That’s all I seem to do these days. Some people have commented on the higher rent I pay for my TX4 and if I'm finding it a struggle. If you add that to the countless other bills I pay weekly then I could really have done without it but it's still a far better cab than the others I've been driving so well worth the extra. The so-called better suspension is causing me a concern though as it seems to have vanished and been replaced with what all the other cabs suffer from. Some would say I'm paranoid about it and maybe I am but for that amount of money you expect nothing less than a smooth ride over some of the worst roads in Europe, or even the world. Since I’ve been paying the weekly rent via the bank I haven’t been near the garage for a month. I’ve had to change a few bulbs here and there but overall it has been a problem-free month, which one would expect with a brand new cab.

I've been out on the streets solo for the last month as Chris has been away in Thailand. He returns tomorrow but probably will need another week to acclimatize back to UK conditions. It's still pretty chilly here in the evenings and some parts are still getting snow although London hasn't had any more since my last post.

The radio circuit I joined about six weeks ago hasn’t proved to be as busy as I might have liked it to be. I probably get offered a handful of jobs per shift but these only reach me after having been rejected by half a dozen other drivers either because the pick up is too far away or the job is basically…shit, for example, E2 to E8 or SE15 to SE27. To those of you that don’t know London postcodes let me translate for you. S.H.I.T. Having said that it does occasionally throw out a little gem and I had a nice ride recently from Maida Vale to Teddington Studios for a well-known TV presenter who used to be in Black Adder (Baldric).

The first few days of the week seem to be the worst when trying to earn my daily bread. As Thursday and the weekend approaches then people start to venture out and it all seems worthwhile once again. There’s been a lot of “brooming down the line” lately and I’ve had to be on my guard with doors locked. Some of these cabbies have no shame about passing on their unwanted crap to the guy behind and I wish they’d do the honourable thing and pull away from a rank instead of remaining there for a better job. I was waiting on the point of the Victoria rank one day last week. I’d done a major bit of bird (as I call waiting too long) when a couple of drunk birds approached the cab. One of them was holding on to the railings she was that bad and there and then I knew they weren’t going anywhere with me. As the first one approached she couldn’t even remember the name of her hotel so she searched her bag for a card and it turned out they wanted the Royal National in Russell Square, a nice enough job if the punters aren’t two rat-arsed Irish girls. In this case I did the honourable thing and refused them and then pulled off empty and went back to the end of the line where after another longish wait I got a job to Waterloo.

I ruined a whole shift recently by getting myself boxed in at St Pancras Station. It was already pretty late but I saw a few cabs waiting and figured these guys must know that there’ll be work coming out soon so I settled in at number three on the rank. Four, five and six pulled in behind me to complete the boxing-in and there we remained for an hour and a bit as everyone except me stood outside of their cabs chatting. After said amount of time they all realised the work had dried up and decided to pull off empty handed and try their luck elsewhere, what a waste.

The luggage space in the front of the cab is resembling a rubbish tip lately with empty wrappers, empty coffee cups and various other bits and bobs there including jump leads which I had to use recently to jump start my brother Johnny’s Beamer. I’ve been getting the cab washed regularly by the guys at Sainsbury’s in Ladbroke Grove and they do a really nice job but they only do the outside as I don’t trust them enough to leave it open while I go shopping.

A Russian female passenger recently commented that the back smelt of fish, bloody cheek!! It did get me thinking though and after she got out I opened the back door and had a long hard sniff and couldn’t smell anything so I surmised that she may have been smelling her own fumes as she was sat on the edge of the seat with her legs open. Cruel, possibly, but we do pick up some mingers from time to time don’t we lads?

Be Lucky

L.C.

White Taxi

My cab, one day last week

Snow and Ice

Hi folks
Time for another post for all those people out there looking for their latest fix.

Since my last post I have celebrated my 47th birthday (30th January). I went up to Ipswich to spend a bit of time with Jane and we had a nice night out at Temptations Chinese Buffet in the town centre. Those buffets are such good value and have such a massive range of dishes that people flock to them in droves and you have to book to get in. We never booked but simply turned up in the hope of getting a table and we were told we had from 7pm until 8.30 to eat and vacate the premises, which turned out to be ample time to stuff ourselves silly. That gave us the rest of the evening to………..do some stargazing!!

On my latest visit to the new taxi garage I met with the co-owner. He was much more business like than the other guy I’ve been seeing there and he insisted that I set up a standing order to pay the weekly cab rent on time. There are two problems I have with that. Firstly, the main reason I left the other garage and came to this one was because it was very close to where my parents live. I don’t visit as much as I’d like due to always working strange hours so moving to this garage would help me visit more often. Now that the money will be paid electronically I won’t get to do that. Secondly, those of you who’ve read the whole blog will know I like a bit of leeway when paying the rent. Now the money will go out every Friday whether I have it or not so if I’ve had a bad week then I’ll be in trouble. I suppose it will have to be a priority now ahead of my house rent and my Inland Revenue payments.

While I was there I got one of the mechanics to fit a headlight and a “For Hire” light bulb. According to my brother in law (Super Mechanic) who also has a TX4 the bulbs blow a lot more often than the other cabs so, at a fiver a pop for a headlight, it’s just as well I don’t have to pay for them. The day after I paid the cab (last Thursday) the other headlight blew so I’ve been the one eyed monster all week including the drive to and from Ipswich.

Fate decided that Sunday night would be the night when London had it’s worst snowfall for 18 years. It started around 6pm with just a few flakes and steadily progressed until the roads were a slippery and dangerous mess. It got so bad that the whole bus network was suspended as was a big part of the train network. This left many thousands of people stranded and those that could afford it in need of a cab ride.
Now, from past experience, if it has snowed heavy then the last place, as a taxi driver, you want to go is anywhere outside of the centre. The reason for this is because you basically end up stranded on impassable roads and stuck on hills. The passenger then gets out and leaves you there to get on with it. So with taxis as the only way home for most people most of the journeys would have ended well outside the centre had I opted to take them but I had to be ruthless and put my own well being first and pick only the shorter jobs that would have kept me in the work. Victoria Station was one such place where I drove in with my doors locked to find a whole queue of people all wanting to go to places like Croydon and Norbury and various other destinations in South and South East London. They’d obviously been there a while and probably been refused by many a cabby so as I slowed at the rank they tried to get in first (possession is nine tenths of the law) and ask questions later. I knew it was going to be stressful working this way so I decided to go home after this job and selected a couple going to Parsons Green. Even this journey was treacherous and I got stuck twice. The first time, as I turned right from Buckingham Palace Road into Pimlico Rd and then again at the junction of Kings Road and Lotts Road where the road elevates over a hump back bridge. I dropped them near Kebab Kid which was still open so I pulled over and treated myself to one of the finest Chicken Shawarmas you’ll get anywhere in London. The radio was going berserk trying to cover work to all corners of London but I’d had enough for one night and crawled home.
The next day proved to be a bumper day for me as at least 50% of all cabs must have been snowed in in the suburbs and the streets were devoid of any traffic. The work was mental. One in, one out everywhere. All of it staying local. I don’t think I crossed the Thames all night. It got really icy on the roads around 2am on the Tuesday morning and I lost control of the cab in Ladbroke Grove. Had anything been coming the other way I would have had a head on smash but luckily the streets were empty and I managed to creep home unscathed. It reminded me of a time in the eighties when I was driving to work one winters morning and I hit black ice on Bollo Lane. The Morris Marina I was driving spun about five times, mounted the pavement, smashed off a wall missing loads of cars on the way and landed back in the road the same way I’d been driving. I didn’t even stop to check the damage I just carried on to work in shock. Dodgy stuff that black ice.

Another thing that happened this week was that I finally scuffed my brand new hub cabs. I decided to stop for a coffee in Cranbourne Street and pulled in to the snow and ice filled right hand side only to hear a grinding sound as the oversized hubcaps scraped the kerb. I was quite upset for a few moments as I’d really tried my best not to let that happen but I think most cabbies will agree that inevitably it always happens.

Four days on and there’s still a lot of snow and ice about with more being forecast.
I stopped for a coffee in Kings Road with Chris tonight and as we sat in my cab putting the world to rights there was a couple of drunks rolling about on the opposite pavement. It was such a funny sight watching them try and get each other up only for them to fall over again. The Chelsea locals seemed appalled and disgusted as they walked past and I thought to myself that I bet one of them would call the police. The two drunks managed to get on their feet and headed for the restaurant and shopping complex at Duke of Yorks Square. Within minutes a police car had pulled up and two officers raced into the complex. Chris and me decided to be nosey and locked up the cab and walked into the square. One of the two drunks was nowhere to be seen but the other one was surrounded by police and the complex’s security guards. We walked past and tried to listen to what was being said and could only glean that the man was Polish and was being asked for ID by one of the policemen. Nothing more to be seen here so we went back to work and I only managed a few more jobs before I had to rush home with dodgy Newingtons. Don’t ask.

Catch you later.

L.C.

Happy New Year

Hi folks

Happy New Year to everyone and here's hoping it's a goodun.

We just celebrated my parents 50th Wedding Anniversary this weekend and family from all over England and Scotland converged on a community centre in Kingsbury, North London to pay their respects. It was organised by my sisters and we all had our part to play by either making some of the food, organising the decoration of the hall or compiling some sort of video tribute to the last 50 years. I think everyone who attended would say it went extremely well and also what a crying shame it was at the amount of food wastage there was at the end. It was also the first chance my girlfriend has had to meet the whole family. She was extremely nervous and apprehensive but needn’t have been as she was warmly welcomed by everyone.

On the work front it has been a very trying time as London tries to get back to normal after Christmas. Some days have been soul destroying as we’ve been driving round aimlessly on empty streets unable to get on already overfilled ranks. These last few days have seen a slight recovery and hopefully a partial return to busier times. There’s definitely an air of doom and gloom everywhere and that could be a major factor why people are not going out and spending their money.

So while the slump goes on there are still bills to be met and the taxi rental to be paid to my new garage weekly. After a month of driving around in my nice shiny new TX4 it is now starting to loosen up and wear in a bit. A few weeks ago it developed a knocking sound when the steering was turned right. Then the knocking got worse to the point where it was either to the left or to the right. I asked at the garage and they told me it would probably be something they couldn’t touch because it would invalidate the warranty so inevitably it started giving me the hump (aka pissing me off)!! I went to the garage on Thursday and demanded they have a look and as it turned out the nuts and bolts on the two rear trailing arms (any ideas??) had worked loose and a quick few turns with a spanner sorted that problem out. I’ve really taken to the cab in a big way and love everything about it especially, trivially too, the auxiliary wire that connects my iPod to the stereo. I’m in a Bon Jovi phase at the moment and recently bought their whole back catalogue and transferred it to the iPod. So I’m enjoying my quiet evenings on the taxi ranks of London with the sound of Bon Jovi blasting out to anyone who cares to listen. Current favourite track is “It’s my life” from the “Crush” album.

The cold and wet weather has probably also contributed to keeping all the troublemakers indoors as I don’t seem to have many stories to tell you since the last post. I did have a few near misses with drunk girls almost getting sick in my brand new cab and me almost losing my cool and throwing them out but it all came to nothing in the end. A few times I’ve been approached on taxi ranks and asked to take a dodgy looking someone to a far away place but I’ve always insisted on payment in full upfront (something I would never have done a few years ago) and the ones who refused to pay upfront remained where they were. I did let my cool persona slip a few weeks back when I was blatantly cut up in Earls Court Road by a bus. This prompted me to overtake him and slam my brakes on in front of him, probably scaring the passengers witless. As I slammed them on he went back round me and did the same to me until we met at the lights at Cromwell Road and exchanged pleasantries with a few hand gestures thrown in for good measure. Silly boys stuff really, not to mention downright irresponsible but we have to make our own amusement in these quiet times ;o)

I’ve applied to re-join Radio Taxis and have been given a date for the installation of the equipment for one day this week. Hopefully I’ll become a proper “radio man” and work it properly. In recent years I’ve always started off enthusiastically but the novelty soon wears off and I become too choosy in regards to the destinations of the jobs. Then I become disillusioned and eventually get the equipment stripped out. I know there’s a credit crunch on but there will hopefully still be work on there and I’ll also be able to do credit cards again which have sometimes proved to be quite lucrative. Watch this space as they say.

Take Care

L.C.

TX1 to TX4

Hi folks

Since my last post, I suppose the main news I have to tell you is that finally, after moaning and bitching about the state of my cab for the last couple of years, I have finally done something about it and moved on to another garage and am now the proud renter of a brand spanking new TX4 Silver.

It's costing me another £40 per week but after having driven it for the last few days I'm sure I've made the right decision.

On a recent return trip from Ipswich I was driving an R reg TX1, as my V reg was in overhaul, and I couldn't even overtake a group of lorries on the M25 as that particular cab had no guts. It was quite embarrassing as I got stuck between a lorry and a van and I think they were messing with me and there was nothing I could do about it.

A day or two later my mate SilverChris, not the other Chris, rang to say that the garage that does work on his cab had just purchased four brand new TX4's and was looking for reliable drivers so after a bit of a think I decided to take the plunge.

Now came the tricky bit. To tell my current garage that I was leaving them for pastures new. Anyone that knows me will know that I can be a bit of a pussy when it comes to confrontations and face-to-face exchanges. So, on the Thursday morning just gone, there I am lying in my pit pondering the meaning of life when my garage rings to say that my V reg is ready for collection after having just been overhauled. OK says me I'll be there in a bit. Now bear in mind I've already agreed with the new garage that I'll be renting from him as soon as the cab is available. 2 minutes later the bloke at the new garage rings to say the TX4 is ready and waiting and what time will I be going to collect it? Panic sets in as my brain tries to absorb these two bits of information. Anyone else reading this would say, "what's the problem? Just give one cab back and go to the other garage and get the nice shiny new one. It's a no brainer" but as I said I have always had a problem leaving one garage for another and over my eighteen years as a cabby have had my wife, mother in law and even Chris go into various garages with some story or other just so that I didn't have to face the owner. None of the above three were instantly available to get me out of this one so I decided to stop being such a wimp and to ring my garage back. One of the mechanics answered and said the owner had just popped out. “Result!!” Thought I. I hung up, jumped out of bed and raced round there so that I could give the cab back to one of the other guys and tell them I wouldn't be back, citing personal reasons. As I approached the garage my heart sank as the owner was standing there chatting to another driver. He waved at me in his friendly Greek way and my brain started ticking as to what I was going to say to him. "Hello mate" I said to him. "I should have rung you a few days ago as I have to go away for a few weeks to sort out some family trouble in Spain" (Where the hell did that come from, I thought). "Nothing serious I hope" says the owner. "I can't really say but I'll ring you as soon as I know when I'll be coming back" "No problem, I hope it all works out" he says all concerned. I felt a bit annoyed with myself at having to deceive him like that as I've always got on well with him and effectively, this would be the last time I would probably ever see him again. Still, that's a part of me that I can't do anything about so I'm stuck with it. I paid him for the three days I owed him and left to make my way to the new garage. As I walked down Holloway Road towards the tube station I felt like I was starting out on a new adventure and even felt a tingle of excitement. After studying the tube map at Holloway Station I deduced it would be too awkward to get the tube as I would have to go south to go north so I bought an Oyster Card and got two buses to Edgware where the new garage is situated. Having been behind the wheel of a cab for so long it felt strange to be on the top deck of a London bus. I sat at the back and read a paper. I changed buses at Friern Barnet and boarded the number 221 and after a few stops the bus was invaded with school kids. They all made their way upstairs and sat all around me and started messing about, throwing things at each other and annoying all the passengers who chose to move away leaving me isolated in the corner at the back. I just continued reading and thought that I would just ignore all the noise even though I found it all quite intimidating. Stop by stop the school kids disembarked and soon all was quiet and orderly again. The bus terminated at Edgware so I got off and was suddenly overcome with the urge to eat as I had been on the go for the last few hours. I went in to the KFC there and had a filet tower burger and a diet coke and walked the short distance to the garage. As I arrived at my unfamiliar new garage, the boss, who had been expecting me, guessed it was me by saying my name and I shook his greasy hand and entered his office to fill in forms and hand over a weeks rent up front. Once the formalities were over he took me outside to show me round the shiny new black cab. One thing that caught my eye straight away was the Blaupunkt CD player and an auxiliary lead protruding from it. This would enable me to hook up my beloved iPod and continue to enjoy my music as I have done in the other cab via the tape deck and a dummy cassette. We shook hands again and he reiterated that he'd like me to pay promptly every Thursday or Friday as he had payments to meet. I thought to myself that if he'd spoken to my previous garage to see if I was a prompt payer then he may not have taken me on but I have been a much better payer in recent months so I don't anticipate any problems. As I drove away the throttle stuck down and I had to brake with the engine racing. "What now" I thought to myself. I immediately put it in reverse and let the revs take me back to the garage entrance where the boss was standing there. I told him the throttle was stuck and he opened my door and saw immediately that the pedal had caught on the mat (which incidentally was an old manky one pulled out of an old cab and spoiling the look of the new cab). He said I could either remove the mat or trim it and I drove away again. Being in the same neighbourhood as my parents I took the opportunity to visit them and then made my way home to prepare for my nights work in the new cab.
So, as I write this I've done a couple of shifts and am now getting used to the cab. There are many differences to a TX1 but it eventually falls in to place and I know I have made the right choice. I'm looking forward to my next visit to Ipswich and to get my own back on all those lorries on the M25 and A12 ! !

So all that remains is to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year 2009.

Take Care Out There ! !

L.C.

Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire

Hi all
I have cable TV at home and they offer On Demand programmes which I find suits me better as I can, after a hard nights graft, settle down with a nice cuppa and maybe a tray of donuts or, lately, a few pounds of roasted chestnuts, to watch a huge range of programmes which I can start when I’m ready to watch. So, flicking through the available programmes I came across one called Taxicab Confessions. It’s been on there for ages but I’ve never fancied watching it but the other night I gave it a go and was greatly entertained for the next few hours. For those of you who don’t know it’s a programme where up to 6 miniature cameras are attached to the inside of various cabs. In the two shows I saw the cabs were either NYC Yellow Cabs or Las Vegas cabs. I would imagine that there were lots of footage of uninteresting fares that ended up on the cutting room floor but the ones that made it to the screen were immensely entertaining and some of them actually quite raunchy with plenty of boobs being flashed and sexy goings-ons, well, going on. Similar things have happened in the back of my cab but the occurrences are very few and far between and those on TV seemed a lot more exciting.

The cold weather is well and truly upon us and we’ve had quite a few instances of snow up and down the country. I looked out of my bedroom window this morning and the cab was white but after a few hours it had all melted. The cold weather is great for finding out if your battery is any good. A couple of Sundays ago as I was starting work and making my way to Paddington I was flagged by a guy in Warrington Crescent who only wanted a jump start. Luckily I had leads with me as he never had any and I managed to get him going in a few minutes. My own taxi battery is probably in need of replacing because after a recent 3-day visit to Ipswich to see Jane it barely started so I may need to tell the guys at the garage tomorrow when I go there to pay the two weeks rent I now owe them.

It’s also a good thing that my heater works well as most people jumping in these days are relieved when that blast of warmth hits them. A few days ago I was driving up St James’s Street when a couple of guys came out of Just St James’s restaurant. They were both wearing army greatcoats and their bearskin headgear like the guys that stand watch at Buckingham and St James’s Palaces. I thought they may have been in fancy dress and asked if they were for real. They answered that they’d just finished guard duty and had popped in for a drink. I was inclined to believe them as army guys have a certain way about them and use a totally different language to everyone else like calling you “chap” instead of “mate”.

There’s a new shopping centre at Shepherds Bush called Westfield. It’s enormous. I popped in to check out the cab rank for the first time and after waiting 20 minutes without the rank having moved up once I pulled off completely disillusioned with the place. Apparently motorists have to pay to park there so I think most people will continue using Brent Cross for the meantime.

I’ve only got a few items of any interest to report since my last post. I had a “scream up” with another cabbie because he reckoned I knicked a job which should’ve gone to the rank. The incident happened on the north side of Sloane Square when I pulled in for a couple of old dears. They were going to Beaufort Street so I had to drive round the square back into Kings Road. As I got caught in traffic by the rank this jobsworth cabbie, who must have eyes like a hawk, got out of his cab and started piping up that I should’ve sent them across to the rank from the other side. Now, I’m all for cab etiquette but in this instance I disagreed so we had a bit of a slanging match whilst the bemused old dears just sat in the back taking it all in. By the way it was Friday night and buzzing everywhere so he really should get a life.

Later on in the shift I trapped a couple going to Southfields from Kensington High Street. They started kissing passionately and the girl decided to straddle the guy, I suppose for better access. I was trying to cop a look through the rear view when I belatedly noticed that some lights I was approaching had turned red. I slammed the brakes on and the two of them shot forward and ended up with a thud on the cab floor. I thought they may be hurt but I was also embarrassed at having slammed on the brakes so I made out I never heard anything. After a few minutes I heard them talking as if nothing had happened and they remained on the floor until we entered their area and I had to ask for directions. They never mentioned anything and neither did I.

So, as December approaches we’re starting to see the first signs of festive spirit with quite a few homes around town already putting up their exterior decorations. I was in Ipswich last week for the turning on of the Christmas light but they hadn’t even put a tree up. They had a nice roasted chestnut stall there though and I warmed myself up with a five quid bag and even ate the rest of Jane’s chestnuts. I love ‘em.

Take Care out there and watch out for black ice on the roads.
LC

The Obama Edition

Hi folks
Has it been that long again?

Well here I am again, sitting at the PC with my trusty Jack Russell at my side. He’s only here because I’m eating a bag of Pistachio nuts and is hoping for a hand out. He’s already had about a third of the bag but until he hears the rustle of the empty packet he hangs around just in case. Don’t you Dude? (like the name?)

I guess I should give a mention to president-elect Barack Obama who as we all know will lead the free world into happier times, hopefully. He’s already said it may not happen this term, or the next so that’s all bases covered just in case he turns out to be no better than Bush. Good luck to him all the same as he’s going to need it.

My girlfriend, who’s called Jane, doesn’t like me mentioning her on here so I won’t other than to say it’s all going well, extremely well and we just had a great break in Norfolk where we visited the towns of Kings Lynn, Sandringham, Huntstanton and Wells-next-the-sea. She’s also just started a new job in her hometown of Ipswich and is, as far as I can tell, enjoying herself. I’ve probably already said too much for her liking so I’ll stop but as it’s a blog about me and my life I felt I should update anyone who’s remotely interested.

And so to work. As I’d be lost without my notes I’m going to refer to them and write chronologically if that’s OK with you all and I’ll try and make it sound as interesting as I can.

Sunday 12th October. Did about 17 jobs going to all corners of London. Whilst on the phone to Chris (remember him?) I was driving a guy to the Citadines on Northumberland Avenue from Victoria. I had both earphones in so as to hear Chris clearly when I notice the guy in the back gesticulating through the mirror. I’d been deep in conversation and suddenly snapped back to reality when I realised I’d gone sailing past Northumberland Avenue and was fast approaching Waterloo Bridge. I removed one earphone and made my apologies and looked for somewhere I could legally make a U turn. It’s not a very nice feeling when you do something wrong and it makes you look unprofessional. There’s no option but to knock a couple of quid off the fare and keep apologising but as it turned out this guy found the funny side of it and paid me, including a tip.

During that same shift I was returning from town after dropping of at Ontario Tower and was double-flashed by the camera in the Limehouse Link. It shows up in the trade paper as one of the camera hotspots but as of yet I haven’t received any notifications so hopefully I won’t receive any more penalty points this year.

Monday 13th October. I was all set for work when another cabbie mate of mine also called Chris, but we call him Silver Chris, popped in for me to have a look at his PDA, which was on the blink. As I’ve mentioned before, most PDA’s need to be used constantly as they lose their charge and all data is lost. The long and short of it was that I couldn’t get the satnav to work so convinced Chris to buy a similar PDA to the one I use. Before he had time to give it a second thought I’d surfed to eBay and he’d bought the required items and then had to log onto Paypal to pay for them. He told me after that he’d felt like he’d been raped as it was all over so quick and he was several pounds (£’s) lighter because of it. The items have since arrived and I have installed satnav and mapping software for him and he couldn’t be happier. I sold the other PDA on eBay and recouped most of what he’s spent so all’s well that ends well.

Thursday 16th October. Jane came to town for the day and we had a pleasant few hours at Brent Cross Shopping Centre before she went home with her son.

Friday 18th October. Was a stressful shift on account of being caught in the West End and unable to get out. I fought my way to Piccadilly westbound and was hailed by the doorman of The Ritz. The trouble was that I had stopped on a box junction, which is monitored by cameras and he turned away to go and get the passengers leaving me stranded and blocking the road. Five bubbly girls then approached me and asked for Sloane Square so I told them to jump in. Girls never just jump in, they have to faff about first. So, I’m still blocking the road, the traffic is honking at me to get out of the way and these girls are all deciding who should get in (as there was 10 in the party). I’m fed up, I’m stressed out so inevitably, like every dormant volcano, I eventually blow!!!!! I could probably be struck off for this but I effed and blinded for all I was worth and eventually they all crammed in and I pulled off the box junction. Then one of them decided to spoil it for all of them. “And don’t fucking swear at us right?” she piped up. The red mist descended over me and I swerved in to the pavement and just said “out!!!”

Her: Oh come on mate we’ve waited ages for a cab
Me: I don’t give a f***, get out.
Her: Why?
Me: Because you should learn to keep your mouth shut.
(Can I just say that after the fact I wasn’t too proud of myself and this sort of thing only happens once in a blue moon)

I was on the phone to the gf at the time and it was the first time she’d heard me lose my cool and wasn’t too impressed with me. The five girls all filed out of the cab and the last one left the door open telling me to get out and close the door myself. There was a nice couple waiting right there for a cab so they just got in and closed the door and I was off to the Intercontinental Hotel just up the road.

The following Saturday 25th October I did my shift without any dramas and at around 3am I dropped off in Selsdon, deepest South London, set my satnav for Ipswich and set off. For the next three days I could forget about work and enjoy some female company and build up my strength for the following Wednesday when I would return to work.

On the Thursday I got up bright and early and headed out to do some chores. I ended up round the back of the Cumberland hotel where there is a cab rank and I walked round to the Prêt a Manger for a latte and a cheese and pickle baguette. I placed the coffee on the dash while I ate my baguette and then forgot all about it as I accelerated away. The coffee upended and burst open all into the luggage-well. I was gutted, to say the least. Now a week later and the milk that soaked into the carpet is now going off and there is a very peculiar smell emanating from it. I gave my daughter a lift somewhere the other day and as she got in she said it smelt of “arse”. Passengers, being polite, wouldn’t say anything but I’m sure they can smell it too. I bought a tin of Febreeze last night and I think it’s masking the smell quite well.

Last Saturday, the 1st of November was a very busy shift. The fanbelt had been screeching for the last few days and I tried to adjust it with a lever I had but it wasn’t strong enough. I went to one of those pound shops on Kilburn High Road and bought the “Mother of all Crowbars”. I don’t know why they’re called pound shops because it cost me £6.99 but it did the job and also doubles as a bit of extra security for those long dark cold nights ahead. The shift went really well and I even picked up a nice job from Brixton out to Brentford, which is unheard of for me, but the Academy had just turned out and they were crying out for cabs.

Monday 3rd of October saw me take my daughter to the cinema to watch Eagle Eye. It was action packed from start to finish and I highly recommend it to anyone who likes fast paced films. The popcorn and drink was nice too.

Wednesday 5th November was Bonfire Night where everyone lets off fireworks and light fires with effigies of Guy Fawkes on top. Work was brisk and I started at Paddington with a job to the Marriot Marble Arch. On arriving the American offered me an American Express card. “Sorry mate I don’t accept cards” I said to him. “What if I don’t have any cash on me?” he says. “Then you shouldn’t be getting in to a cab without the means to pay” “But I do have the means to pay” waiving the card at me. “Not in this cab mate, you’d better go inside and get some cash”. He wasn’t too impressed. I’d stopped the meter at £5 when we arrived and had I kept it going it would have now been at around £8 by the time he returned but all I got was the £5 and not even a thank you nor anything similar.

The next few jobs kept me in and around central London so I stopped for a bite to eat at the Astral in Regency Street. I bought a tuna and sweetcorn baguette a latte and a custard tart and drove up to the Raft in Victoria to wait for a job whilst eating but as I arrived there was a burst on and I had to eat as I drove my fare to……..wait for it……back to Regency Street. On the way there I clipped the back of a cab that had made a half left turn then stopped abruptly and now I have a nice scuff mark spanning both my nearside doors and my rear wheel arch. I have to go to the cab garage to pay the rent tomorrow so I hope they have a new advert to cover the marks up. I waited for the driver of the cab to get out and approach me but after a few moments he never bothered so neither did I.

The only thing to ruin my night other than the scuff marks was when I dropped a nice lady in Putney and asked for the £25 fare. She handed me what I thought was a twenty and a five and I drove off. On closer inspection I saw that it was a ten and a five so I’d done myself out of a tenner, which took me a while to get over, I actually felt like chinning someone but it wore off eventually. What goes around comes around.

You may have noticed the Coolbox Hire link in my side bar. That company belongs to my sister and she had a large order of 10 cool boxes that needed delivering last week. Today they needed collecting and returning to her so I helped her out by picking up five of the said boxes. The traffic there and back was ridiculous and I don’t know why anyone would want to put themselves through that on a daily basis. No thanks. I’ll stay on nights for now.

Catch you all later. LC

AW Says We're Quits!!!

Hi there people
Over the last few weeks I’ve been over to Suffolk to visit the gf a few times, had a few ding-dongs and made up again so at present everything is hunky dory and long may it remain so. I visited Bury St Edmunds on my latest trip and spent a few rainy hours there. I’ll have to return in the summer to check it out properly as I was well impressed with the place.

On the work front all I’ve been reading and hearing about is the bloody credit crunch. There’ve been banks collapsing left right and centre, other companies folding, billions wiped off share values but I’ve found it busier than ever out there so obviously people still can’t be too skint as they’re taking more cabs than ever at present. Long may that continue too.

90% of all customers are fantastic but there are still the few idiots out there who try your patience. A few days ago I was hailed by a couple of guys who looked dodgy, to say the least, at Vauxhall. They wanted me to drive somewhere nearby to collect someone who was “ill**” and then drive them all to a hospital in Carshalton. I asked if that person were likely to be “ill” in the cab, and by that I meant were they likely to get sick. Their answer wasn’t convincing enough so I refused. The last thing I needed at that time on a Friday night was a cab full of puke, and the smell that always accompanies it. One of them proceeded to kick and punch the cab as I started driving away, almost certainly denting one of the rear panels. I was chatting to the gf at the time and lost my rag and was just about to jump out and dent a few of his panels when the gf convinced me it wouldn’t be worth it and her soothing tones soon calmed me down. (Cheers darling!!) But this sort of behaviour can be a regular occurrence in the evenings and thankfully it isn’t my cab but a lot of owner drivers out there wouldn’t have let it go so any potential cab booters out there reading this please think twice before you do it.

** Ill invariably means pissed as a newt and likely to get sick especially on longer journeys.

I picked a guy up in Cavendish Square the other night. He’d been to the nightspot at No.5 where inside he’d met and spoken to ex page 3 model and pop star Samantha Fox and her lesbian partner (according to him). He’d been intoxicated by Fox’s apparent beauty and couldn’t wait to tell everyone about it. Once he’d finished telling me he rang his mother and about four different friends and had the same conversation with all of them. She had obviously made an impression on him and I had to admit to myself that in the late 70’s and 80’s she’d been a page 3 favourite of mine along with the luscious Linda Lusardi. Oh Happy Days!!!

I was driving along the western end of the Kings Road when a guy flagged me down and asked to be taken to East Dulwich. “Simple enough route” thought I. “Over Chelsea Bridge, Clapham Old Town, Acre Lane, Herne Hill blah blah blah Simple”
“Why are you taking me this way?” he pipes up.
Me: What way should I be going then?
Him: Vauxhall Bridge or even Westminster Bridge. (He’s obviously on drugs!!)
Me: What from where I picked you up?
Him: That’s the way I drive it.
Me: But that don’t make it the right way.
Him: I use satnav and it always gets me to my destination.
Well all I can say in answer to that is thank God for the Knowledge.

I was dropping four Aussies in Harlesden recently when my phone started ringing. A check of the caller display told me it was none other than Titanic, my mate Chris.

Him: Where are ya? (This is said in an Irish accent, don’t ask)
Me: Harlesden.
Him: I’m holding a job here to Northwood Hills and she wants a price. D’you want it?
Me: Yeah, where abouts are you?
Him: Baker Street.
Me: Go on then.

He’s done this for me before whilst waiting at Baker Street Underground Station for a radio job but I’m often a lot nearer. The danger is the passenger won’t want to wait and they’ll walk out onto the street and get another cab there. So I had to drive like a maniac all the way from Harlesden cursing every red light that seemed to be changing as I approached. He got her to wait in the cab and I was there in about 10 minutes and finished my shift with a nice fifty pound ride out into my favourite part of London. Cheers Chris I owe you another one, mind you AW says we’re quits!!!!

Being a diabetic it goes without saying that I have to watch what I eat. By the same token I also have to watch it if I don’t eat as I can be in danger of suffering from low blood sugar, or a hypo, as it’s called. I had to drop my daughter at Charing Cross recently and as I approached Admiralty Arch, as I hadn’t eaten anything all day a hypo started taking a grip of me. I started feeling really rough and knew I had to get some food inside me pronto so I chucked her out at the Arch as the traffic was solid and spun round and headed for the Astral Café in Regency Street and ordered a Spag Bol. While I stood with all the other cabbies waiting for my food I grabbed a bar of chocolate out of the fridge and started munching it. It takes about 15 to 20 minutes for the nourishment to kick in so as I sat in my cab after my meal a wave of relief washed over me and I was good to go about 15 minutes after that. I must get a stash of sugary things and keep them in the boot for such occasions.

Saturday the 4th of October found me driving south down Marylebone High Street when four dudes flagged me down and asked for the Griffin Strip Club in Clerkenwell Road. They were all well oiled or even high on something but they asked for some music and if it could possibly be rock music. Now, as some of you might know, I often have my radio on whilst eating my meals in the cab and my radio station of choice is Virgin. Well they have recently changed their name to Absolute Radio as apparently Richard Branson has nothing to do with them anymore. They have a female DJ on in the evenings (don’t know her name yet) who plays all the great numbers from the 70’s and 80’s. I’m talking Pink Floyd, Led Zep, AC/DC, Yes, Free and many more. The four dudes started head banging (including air guitars) to Free’s Alright Now followed by Boston’s More Than A Feeling and were really pumped up by the time I arrived at their destination so I got a nice tip and plenty of thanks for the great music. So if you’re into rock check out Absolute Radio on FM or the net.

I went to the cab garage yesterday to pay my weekly rent and the owner was at the helm as all the hired help had finished for the day. His one solitary TX4 was still sitting there in the garage after the PCO revoked all the licences of the ’56 plated cabs due to them mysteriously catching fire. Luckily he only has the one and is still earning money from all his older cabs but I pity these one man bands that are now forced to rent another cab and still meet the payments for their useless TX4 whilst investigations are ongoing. The latest trade papers say that there will be compensation due when it’s all sorted but I would be very dubious of ever receiving a penny from them. Good luck to all affected cabbies out there.

Check back soon.

LC

Back From Spain

Since my last post I have spent a week in the land of Spain where I go once a year with my mother. I never really enjoy it I just wait for the week to end and then return and get back in to my routine. I was a bit apprehensive of flying this time when I saw that my plane was to be an Airbus instead of the usual Boeing 737. But it all turned out ok and the return flight was the exact same plane as I sat in the same seat and noticed a few tell-tale marks that I’d seen on the way out.

When I arrived at Luton Airport last Wednesday (17th) Chris collected us and after dropping my mum at home he drove me to the cab garage to collect my cab. I rang the garage to let them know I was on my way and the owner got on the phone to tell me he thought that I was taking two weeks off and that he’d rented out my cab to someone else. I was to ring him the next day to see if he had anything else available. Fine, thought I. I’ll use this as an excuse to find another garage as I’d been wanting to try somewhere else for ages. Chris had a trade paper in the cab and we started looking through it and trying a few numbers. Nobody had any cabs immediately available and it was looking like I’d be taking an extended holiday. Just when I was getting used to the idea of an extra day off my regular garage rang me back to say that they had a TX4, which I could use for a few days. It’s the only one in the garage and the regular driver was away on holiday. I went straight round there to collect it. I’d heard a lot about these cabs such as the smoother suspension and the faster acceleration but at the end of the day it was just another cab, which would cost me another forty quid a week if I were to rent it permanently. I worked it for two shifts, Wednesday and Thursday, and to be honest, I wasn’t overly impressed and was actually glad to get my own TX1 back on the Friday. The owner told me he’d taken it to have the gearbox serviced but as soon as I drove it out of the garage I could smell the gearbox fluid burning on the exhaust, a smell that wasn’t there last week. I’ve been working it all week and have even driven to see my girlfriend who lives in Suffolk and the smell has been there permanently. I don’t think I’ll be able to stand it much longer so hopefully I’ll get a call from one of those other garages that took my details to tell me that they have a nice cab waiting for me.

On the work front it’s been pretty steady. I always think that after the school restart at the beginning of September the work picks up until Christmas and then dies off again.

About a week before I went to Spain I picked up three guys in the West End and they asked to be taken to Mile End. They were chatting away to each other and as I drove through Whitechapel one of them asked me to stop for cigarettes. I pulled in to the Shell garage on Whitechapel road and one of them got out. The one who seemed the most dominant of the three calls out to me and says (in a strong Russian accent) “hey, can you stop the meter?”
Me: What for?
Him: Because we are not moving.
Me: But you are still in the taxi enjoying the comfort.
Him: But we are not going anywhere.
Me: Tell me something, would you work for nothing?
Him: No
Me: Well then. The meter stays on.
Him: OK I understand. Business is business.
Me: Exactly.
The other guy returned with the cigarettes and we proceed. A few minutes down the road and the Russian (I think the other two were Scandinavian) says that we need to stop again to buy some Vodka. He’s actually getting on my tits now with the way he speaks to me but I play it cool and start looking for an open off license. He starts directing me to Roman Road and is telling the other two that they’re going back to his place to have a good drink. All of a sudden one of the Scandinavians asks me to stop and turns to the Russian to tell him that they’re not comfortable with whats happening. The other Scandinavian was very quiet and had his head bowed, as if embarrassed. The first man starts telling the Russian that they don’t mean to offend him but they just want to go back to their “nice, safe hotel” in Central London. The Russian starts getting all offended and tells them that in his country if you refuse to have a drink of Vodka with someone its taken as a massive insult. So this goes on for a few minutes with me sitting there, the meter ticking over and the other man sitting silently until eventually the Russian gets out leaving me to drive these two guys back to their hotel in Portman Square and pocket a nice fee of fifty pounds. There was definitely something dodgy about the Russian and they could see it. As soon as he got out the two Scandics started jabbering away in their own language and were laughing and joking with each other, no doubt relieved at the close shave they’d just experienced.

I had one bit of grief worth mentioning last month when a man approached me on the rank at Victoria. He asked me to take him to Enfield. As he opened the door another man got in instead. They were obviously together but only this man was going to Enfield and he was rat-arsed drunk and instantly fell asleep. As I wound my way through the streets he suddenly awoke and opened one of the doors whilst I was stopped at the traffic lights in Harewood Place. I thought he was getting out so I pulled over and stuck my hazards on, blocking everything behind me. He never got out so I asked him what he was doing and he told me to carry on, waiving me forward. I knew at that point I wasn’t taking him any further and asked him to pay up and get out. We started arguing and I jumped out and started shouting at him whilst everyone in the McDonalds enjoyed the show. He was accusing me of all sorts and reckoned it should only cost a tenner to Enfield from Victoria and that he’d done the trip many times before. I changed tactics and started talking to him more gently saying that I was trying to earn a living to support my family and was he always in the habit of ruining cab drivers nights etc etc and he eventually came round to my way of thinking, paid up and nearly got run over in Oxford Street as I drove away. I think I’m getting better at spotting the nutters and dealing with the situation before its too late and I’m caught out in the sticks seriously out of pocket.

The best four days of the week are upon us now so hopefully I can earn plenty and have a few stories to tell you over the next week.

Check back soon. LC

Get Well Soon Ed

Hello everyone and apologies for the slow down in posting but as I said in the last one I’ve been otherwise engaged. Talking of which I recently spent a few days out of town visiting aforementioned person and enjoying the delights of the east coastal towns of Lowestoft and Great Yarmouth. Being an ex-seafaring person I took the opportunity to do a bit of boat-spotting and visiting in the ports of Felixtowe and Lowestoft and all those happy memories from my days gone by came flooding back. I think you have to have done it to appreciate it. I also bought a souvenir boat to go with my ever-growing collection in my maritime themed bedroom. We also visited the model village in Yarmouth and I was overheard saying that it was similar to the one in Beaconsfield to which the village person said “yes but this one’s better than Beaconsfield”. I’m not sure about that but will have to check it out again some day.

So as my annual trip to Spain approaches I have to say I don’t really fancy it this year. I could think of a few better things to do instead of sweltering in 90-degree heat for a week with my mother but as it’s an annual commitment then I’ll just have to grin and bear it.

While I’m on the subject of family may I just mention my cousin Ed who is recovering in hospital in Northallerton after a serious operation. Me and all my family wish him a speedy recovery after a very serious scare and our thoughts are with him, his mum and dad and his brother and sister at this time.

I’ve had some really nice jobs since I last posted.
Saturday the 2nd of August saw me sitting third on the South Kensington rank when a lady weighed down with shopping bags approached the front cab with a piece of paper. He shook his head and she approached the next one. He also shook his head and finally arrived at my window. The piece of paper was illegible but rather than refuse her I asked where she was going. In a heavily Russian-accented voice she asked for what sounded like the Pilsbury International Terminal. “Never heard of it” thought I, but never one to give up – in my thirst for knowledge- I took another look at the paper and noticed it was a map and ringed on it was an area east of London, not east London but east of London so putting two and two together I said “do you mean Tilbury??” “Da Tilbury” she exclaimed. I’d done a trip to a passenger ship here many years ago so I knew exactly where she wanted. Funnily enough on that occasion it was also Russian. I told her the fare would be in the region of £100 and she tried to haggle me down to £80 but I said no and off we went. The journey was uneventful but very pleasant and more maritime memories came flooding back as I approached Tilbury docks, as this was where I went on a ships visit as a student of the sea school in Gravesend in December 1978. (For any merchant sailors out there the visit was to the OCL container ship MV Discovery Bay. ) As I arrived at her ship the meter read £98.80 so not a bad estimate and she handed me £95 in notes and started fumbling about for the rest so I told her to forget it. As I was preparing to leave a couple emerged from the vicinity of the ship and asked if I was for hire. Now I’m not supposed to pick fares up outside the Met but as they only wanted to go locally I agreed to take them and I dropped them at the Park Inn at Thurrock and then made my way back to London.

The following night I was having a coffee with Chris at Marylebone Station and after we finished he went towards Paddington and I drove onto the station rank at Marylebone. A guy came out and asked if I also did trips out of town, “yes I do, where would you like to go?” I answered, barely able to contain my excitement. “High Wycombe” I got straight on the phone to Chris to gloat about a job which could have been his had he gone on to the rank ahead of me and he was well gutted.

I’m calling on all cabbies to help me out with something here. There’s a cut through from High Holborn via the archway to the Renaissance hotel, which ends up in Lincolns Inn Fields. Chris told me about it the other night and I had to go and see for myself. From what I can see it can be done both ways and is not illegal (as far as I can tell). Can any of you confirm this? I would imagine it’s used all day long when the traffic’s bad but there’s not much call for it at night. It’s a bit like the one at Lower Robert Street onto Savoy street, now there really is a “blinding little cut through” as my knowledge mate Noel used to say.

I recently had some trouble with my iPod and wasn’t able to connect to iTunes. I tried everything such as connecting to other computers and even went to the Apple store in Regent Street but the queue was too long. I eventually found an alternative program on the net called Annapod and bought it online and it now works fine and I can edit and add tracks to my heart content. Chris came round to add some songs to his iPod and when I hooked it up and tried to do a few transfers his whole iPod got wiped, all 2 and a bit thousand songs gone. He was quite philosophical about it, the old chris would have gone mental. He went off to work and I attempted to recover all the lost songs, which I eventually found in an Annapod folder so if any of you have the same problem connecting to iTunes I suggest this program, it’s only about fifteen quid.

I was visiting my girlfriend at her place of work in the St Johns Wood area when we decided we’d like fish and chips for lunch. I had parked the cab up in a side street and didn’t want to lose the space so decided to hail a cab in Finchley road. As a silver TX2 stopped for me I asked him if he minded taking me to the Seashell in Lisson Grove waiting and bringing me back and also did he mind the smell of fish and chips in his cab. I think he was going to refuse me but thought that it would probably be a nice job money-wise and agreed. I never told him I was a cabbie and he started giving me all the cabbie spiel to secure a better tip at journeys end. I just smiled to myself and humoured him. When we arrived at the Seashell I asked him if he fancied a portion of chips but he declined. They never had any rock salmon ready so I had to have cod, which is my least favourite fish. I made my way back to the cab, which had turned round to face the way we had come for the return journey. Back at my destination the fare ended up at £12 and I gave him £15 and I wished him luck for the rest of his shift. The cod wasn’t too bad but give me rock every time.

So for the next 13 days I have to graft hard to get everything ready for my week away. I paid my cab yesterday. For the last 6 weeks I have paid on time and have found it so stress free as opposed to those weeks when I have to find the best part of a grand. The genial Irishman has left the garage due to ill health and there is now a very efficient girl in the office called Nicola. I just had a new set of ads stuck to the side of the cab yesterday, which is already turning heads. I also asked the owner to consider me for the next TX2 that becomes available as I plan to make regular trips to Suffolk to see my gf who lives there. The new Mercedes Taxi is now out on our streets but I have yet to see one. I’ll be monitoring the feedback over the next few months and may even decide to get one of them. Watch this space.

The New Mercedes London Taxi